# 418 The Proverbs – ‘A manual for living’ (MSG). Proverbs 6:20-35. The danger of lust, just in case we have not yet understood the message!

I guess you could say that the author of Proverbs understands the subject of human sexuality as very serious, because the way a person views sex and acts upon it, results in serious consequences (some good, but some similar to swimming with alligators!).

So far (in Chapter 5) we have discussed the importance of walking wisely in relation to this subject, then the sense of regret when we realize we have acted unwisely. Then we concluded with “A Far Better Way” as we considered God’s plan for a man and a woman in marriage.

Chapter 6:20-35 again takes us back to “lust” and its potential implications. In an age where this word is very unpopular (or popular for all the wrong reasons) and has almost lost its real meaning, Timothy Keller asks the question, “What is lust?” He answers mentioning Proverbs 6:25 where it says: ²⁵ Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes. This verse “warns against lusting after someone’s beauty. It is one thing to recognize and appreciate someone’s physical attractiveness. It is another thing to be intensely driven to possess someone’s beautiful body for your own. We often say that a lust-driven man ‘wants a woman’ but as C.S. Lewis points out, ‘strictly speaking, a woman is just what he does not want. He wants a pleasure for which a [beautiful] woman is a necessary piece of apparatus.’” (# 51) 

Consider the tragic story of David and Bathsheba found in 2 Samuel 11. Up until this time, David, although not perfect, was doing pretty well as King of Israel seeking to obey the God who had exalted him to that position from being a humble shepherd in his youth. Then he was overcome by his lust and as one sin led to another, his life changed dramatically (and the lives of the people and nation around him). Basically, giving into his lust was the beginning of the downhill direction of his life. Very sad!

Again, the words of Keller: In contrast, “Real love moves you to give yourself fully to a particular man or woman. Lust works in the opposite direction. It wants to get a fulfilling, self-maximising experience from the person. In the Biblical view, the purpose of sex is not personal self-expression (in order to be happy) but personal self-donation that brings permanent unity and life (in imitation of Christ, Ephesians 5:22ff.) Sex without the giving of oneself is a monstrosity, akin to a body walking around without a head. Lust and sex without marriage is like tasting food without swallowing and digesting it.” (# 51)

And so, knowing these truths, the author continues:

²⁰ My son, keep your father’s command
    and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.
²¹ Bind them always on your heart;
    fasten them around your neck.

And why is this so important? Because:

²² When you walk, they will guide you;
    when you sleep, they will watch over you;
    when you awake, they will speak to you.

Wisdom being the same as the Word of God described as:

²³ For this command is a lamp,
    this teaching is a light,
and correction and instruction
    are the way to life,

In other words, light in contrast to darkness and life in contrast to death.

And with your life saturated with these wonderful truths, God will help you:

²⁴ keeping you from your neighbor’s wife,
    from the smooth talk of a wayward woman.

Remembering that definition of lust described above:

²⁵ Do not lust in your heart after her beauty
    or let her captivate you with her eyes.

And so, God has a created order of all things and obeying these leads to freedom, but when we stray from that created order, we are in danger of being “burned” as it says here:

²⁷ Can a man scoop fire into his lap
    without his clothes being burned?
²⁸ Can a man walk on hot coals
    without his feet being scorched?
²⁹ So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife;
    no one who touches her will go unpunished.

Ouch! Who would do that? Well, basically the Proverbial “fool” and so he continues:

³² But a man who commits adultery has no sense;
    whoever does so destroys himself.
³³ Blows and disgrace are his lot,
    and his shame will never be wiped away.

Or, as the Message puts it:

Adultery is a brainless act,
    soul-destroying, self-destructive;
Expect a bloody nose, a black eye,
    and a reputation ruined for good.

And as this suggests, the implications (of adultery) may not only be emotional and spiritual but also very physical:

³⁴ For jealousy arouses a husband’s fury,
    and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge.
³⁵ He will not accept any compensation;
    he will refuse a bribe, however great it is.

Let me finish with the wise words of Kathleen Nielson:

“God set up marriage in the very beginning in order to tell us human beings something about himself… Something that grows clearer and clearer through the whole biblical story… something about the relationship he has with his people, and will have forever, through the salvation accomplished by Christ Jesus his Son. Marriage is at the heart of God’s creation of us, and of God’s communication with us. In God’s world, adultery does not make sense.” (# 55)

And some good advice from Paul:

So…set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.            (1 Timothy 4:12b)