“Why is she so offended. I was only joking!” I guess you have heard a statement like this many times. Just maybe, you have said it yourself. Only joking! Only some casual remark! Or maybe a sarcastic comment. But the implications could well be a broken relationship. Proverbs 15:1 sums it up when it tells us that A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 18 also has lots to say about the foolish use of words and their implications. Consider the following examples:
An unfriendly person pursues selfish ends and against all sound judgment starts quarrels.
2 Fools find no pleasure in understanding
but delight in airing their own opinions.
4 The words of the mouth are deep waters,
but the fountain of wisdom is a rushing stream.
6 The lips of fools bring them strife,
and their mouths invite a beating.
7 The mouths of fools are their undoing,
and their lips are a snare to their very lives.
8 The words of a gossip are like choice morsels;
they go down to the inmost parts.
13 To answer before listening—
that is folly and shame.
20 From the fruit of their mouth a person’s stomach is filled;
with the harvest of their lips they are satisfied.
And then verse 21 sums it all up:
21 The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.
Keller comments:
“You are not wise unless you fully grasp the power of words. Words pierce like swords [12:18] – they get into your heart and soul. When you say a hurtful word, you can never make things as if it had never been uttered. It’s like the wound from a sword. The wound may heal, but your body will never be the same as if the sword had never cut you. The scar remains… 18:21 goes further and says that words can kill. Words have been triggers for murders, suicides, and actual wars. Also, words kill psychologically… Words designed to hurt are like toxic chemicals. Once they get into the ground, they just pollute everything.” (# 51)
On the other hand, words can be comforting, encouraging, healing and give positive direction and counsel. Proverbs 12:14 and 15:4 says:
From the fruit of their lips people are filled with good things… The soothing tongue is a tree of life…
Keller comments:
“Words can wound but also heal. The tongue can be soothing and a tree of life. Words are like fruit or food for us, we need them to live… We also need words coming from the outside to affirm and validate us… Supremely, the Word of God has a living power to relate us to God and change our minds and hearts (Hebrews 4:12, 1 Peter 1:23). We do not live by bread alone but by good words, especially those in line with God’s.” (# 51)
Lord, may my words be like a fountain of wisdom, bringing life and blessing to those to whom I speak and not causing hurt and pain or death. Teach me to be “light” and “salt” in this sad hurting world of ours. In Jesus powerful name. Amen.
Worship and Wisdom - Psalms and Proverbs 