How many times have you heard the words, “it was just a harmless white lie!” or “it wasn’t really a lie, it just wasn’t the whole truth!” or “well, maybe it was a bit exaggerated”?
How did it feel if you were the one being lied to? How did it feel after you had lied about a certain situation?
Lying is an insidious problem in our society. It takes many forms such as those mentioned above as well as flattery, false accusation, blame shifting, plagiarism, false confessions etc. Sadly, as children in Australia we learn to lie early from those around us, maybe to protect ourselves or somebody else or to make some gain from somebody. Then there is the influence of the media where lying is seen as entertainment. How many times have you watched a program where one lie leads to another until everyone is totally messed up by the deception. And then, of course there are all those scams that are out there lying to people in order to steal from them.
When I lived overseas, one of the difficult cultural norms to adjust to was when I learnt that what I was often told was not necessarily the truth, but rather it was what the person thought I wanted to hear. It was all part of what is known as a “culture of honour and shame.” So, to give me the answer I was wanting was, theoretically, to give me honour! Obviously, those around me knew what was the truth and what was done to give ‘honour’, but being a foreigner who would have preferred the truth, it made these situations a challenge at times. For example when asking for a job to be done, the answer would often be “ok, tomorrow.” But in reality, he would say this in order not to dishonour me, and actually he had a wedding to go to “tomorrow” and would be away for a week! Frustrating for the person from a western culture like me.
Proverbs has a bit to say about lying and 5 of these are in chapter 19 as follows:
Better to be poor and honest
than to be dishonest and a fool. (19:1 NLT)
A false witness will not go unpunished,
nor will a liar escape. (19:5 NLT)
A false witness will not go unpunished,
and a liar will be destroyed. (19:9 NLT)
Loyalty makes a person attractive.
It is better to be poor than dishonest. (19:22 NLT)
A corrupt witness makes a mockery of justice;
the mouth of the wicked gulps down evil. (19:28 NLT)
Timothy Keller comments on verse 5 when in one version it puts it, whoever pours out lies will not go free. He says: “The image of literally lying with every breath, reminds us of how pervasive and diverse lying can be. There are all kinds of lies [as I mentioned above], and it is possible to lie constantly all through the day. There are polite lies… there are euphemisms [a mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing] … exaggerations… there is word inflation [saying things to make you look good] … benevolent lies [to cover up for another] … and routine business lies… we pour out lies.”
He prays: “Lord the sins of my tongue are so many! Because of pride I talk too much or harshly, because of fear, too little or dishonestly. Forgive me, and cure me of the false motives that make my speech so unlike yours. Amen.” (# 51)
And so, there is a better way. Consider the following from Proverbs:
Kind and encouraging words: Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up. (12:29 NLT)
Gentle words: A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. (15:1 NLT)
Appropriate words: The lips of the godly speak helpful words, but the mouth of the wicked speaks perverse words. (10:32 NLT)
Healing words: Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing. (12:18 NLT)
And much more!
Then the best part is that, even when we are unsure of the truth of what another person is telling us, one thing is for sure and that is, Every word of God proves true. He is a shield to all who come to him for protection. (30:5 NLT)
John said of Jesus:
14 The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. (John 1:14)
And Jesus said of himself:
“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (John 14:6)
And Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8 31-32)
In a world full of lies, what a relief that in Jesus we can discover grace and truth and be set free!
Worship and Wisdom - Psalms and Proverbs 