Women are spoken of many times in the book of Proverbs, so it is appropriate that the big finale is about a woman/wife who is worth far more than rubies! She is one who is very practical and hardworking but also speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. And then the summary: 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Nielson comments: “With amazing artistry, this [acrostic] poem of the ‘excellent wife’ brings together all the book’s themes on one culminating poem-portrait of wisdom at work… of wisdom in action, in the life of a wife… [it is] poetic intricacy and excellence… a fitting end to the whole work of art…” that is the Book of Proverbs. (# 55)
So, does this work of poetic art actually describe a real woman or just the ideal wife? Well, according to Nielson, “as most agree, the Proverbs 31 woman is a real-life woman… [she] is solidly planted in a particular home and family and profession; we have no convincing reason to regard her as a picture of wisdom rather than as a real woman living it out.” (# 55)
This is not the first time that a wife of ‘noble character’ has been mentioned in Proverbs. The first time is in chapter 12:4 when she is compared to her opposite number: A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. The next time is here in 31:10 when the question is asked: A wife of noble character who can find? And finally in 31:28-29 where we read: 28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”
T Keller comments that the word ‘noble’ actually “means to be courageous or valiant, ordinarily used of warriors.” He suggests that both men and women require this characteristic for “Life – and family life – [which] requires doing the right thing despite your fears… [it requires] a spirit of courage [for] both husbands and wives.” (# 51)
So, let’s look at some of the ways the author of Proverbs describes this courageous and valiant woman:
10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies!
Firstly, the question is asked, and it sounds a bit like this type of woman “is not an impossible dream, but such a wife is sufficiently rare to require a diligent search.” (# 53) Similar to the way a diligent miner searches for rubies!
Nielson then brings out an interesting point. She writes that when we consider all that has gone before in the teaching about wisdom in Proverbs, particularly how it is often a son receiving instructions from his parents, “then, Proverbs 31 is not written to women to instruct them in how to be good wives; it is written to men (and to all of us) to instruct them (and all of us) in what we should seek. Without a doubt, wives can and should learn from this poem. But wives are not the primary audience.” (# 55)
So, the description continues:
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
Obviously this marriage is quite a partnership where the husband and wife know each other well and know their roles and have full confidence in each other’s abilities.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
All medical people are aware of the Hippocratic principle, “to help or at least to do no harm.” Well, our wife of noble character was also aware of this principle and went out of her way to bring good, not harm. Such are the “benefits of wisdom in that it promotes life and avoids all that threatens it.” (# 53)
Next time we will consider just how this works out in her everyday life. In the meantime, if you are a man and seeking God for the right wife for you, then remember these key words: 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Worship and Wisdom - Psalms and Proverbs 